Monday, January 12, 2015
Week 16, Day 106 - The Difference
I'm really proud of myself for losing 15 lbs so far. But I keep worrying that I will somehow slip up, forget my goal, or just give up altogether. So I've been thinking about what I'm doing this time around that keeps me motivated, as opposed to the other times where I ultimately gave up. Hopefully recognizing these differences will help me keep them going. Here are three that I've noticed:
1. A sincere desire to change. I knew I needed to lose weight for over a year before I seriously did anything about it. It just felt so insurmountable that I didn't even want to try, for fear of failure (again). But I realized that my dream of having a family would only happen if I got healthy. It was the only surefire way to get what I want most in the world. Once that clicked something lit a fire underneath me and I haven't looked back.
Before, wanting to lose weight was all about feeling pretty. Of course I want to feel beautiful again, and I want to be healthy. But now I also want a family and a strong, athletic body. I suppose I also want to prove to myself that I have some fight in me. I'm not letting PCOS win.
2. Creating and keeping good habits. Good intentions can only take you so far. Making good habits has helped me consistently lose weight. I put it in my schedule that I will work out at least 3 days a week. I count every single calorie I put into my body. I wear my FitBit non-stop...seriously. I even shower with it. On workout days, I mentally prepare myself to drive home from work, change into workout clothes, and get moving. (Before I would just come home and watch TV). I walk the dogs once or even twice a day when I can, and Matt has been really good about reminding me to get my steps in. All of these good habits turned a diet into a lifestyle change. I just had to make the habits consciously and then they kind of stuck.
3. A positive attitude. It can be really easy to feel defeated about being overweight, especially when you've been overweight for most of your life as I have. But keeping a positive attitude about losing weight has been very emotionally freeing. I simply won't let myself think that I can't do it.
I will do it. I will lose the weight. I will get to my goal. I will finish strong. I will do everything I can to make that happen. I will forgive myself for having setbacks because I'm human. I will follow Dolvett's mantra, Hard Work & Dedication. I will cut myself some slack. I will put the work in. I will rest when I need to. No matter what happens, I will get healthy.
Hopefully I will be able to come back to this post someday when my motivation has waned. I will read it and remember why I'm doing this. THIS IS HERE TO MOTIVATE MY FUTURE SELF! Keep going, girl.