I have recently stumbled upon a mass of free time. I don't want to waste it, so I started a list of goals I want to accomplish. Putting things online always makes me feel more accountable. This website, 43 Things, is a place where you can write down your goals and check them off when you're done! You can see how many people are working towards the same goal, and write how you accomplished it when you finish.
Here are my first six goals. And now I can cross two things off that list because I went to a yoga class on Saturday (and am going again this week), and I wrote a letter to myself in five years. Because I will probably lose track of it otherwise, I am posting my letter here. And can someone remind me to come back and read it in 2015? kthx.
I did a letter like this in high school, but it was lame. And right now, it's hard to look past the next two years. So this is about perspective. Matt just left on Wednesday, March 10, 2010 for his mission. He will be in the Philippines for the next two years teaching the Gospel of Jesus Christ to the people there. After dating him for two years, it's been hard to let him go. I really don't remember how to be alone. Although I know I am not alone, it feels like it because he is my best friend and we were inseparable.
Life is just not as vibrant without him right now, and I need to find that again. I need to be okay with being alone. I need to build myself up and become stronger. I know I can do it. I need to keep myself busy, learn new things, and accomplish my goals. This list is all because of 43things.com. It's an online goal-setting website where you list what you want to do, and get to check it off once you finish it. Having it online makes me feel more accountable. Writing a letter to myself is my number 2 right now after learning yoga. I went to a class on Saturday, so that could probably be checked off.
Future self (self...), I want you to know that things will get easier. Hard things always do. Everything that I have done in my life that was worth it has been or has started off hard. It seems like the end of the world now, in the first week that he is gone, but you know that it isn't. The world will keep revolving, and it won't be around you. Get out there and help people. Forget yourself. That is what Matt is doing right now, and you need to do it, too. Reunite at the end of two years better people, and have no regrets. You will regret sitting around wallowing for him.
In five years, I hope you will have accomplished many things. I hope you will have stretched yourself physically, emotionally, spiritually and socially. I hope you will have graduated college, supported yourself, bought a car, hopefully gotten married, and started a family. I hope you will always try to better yourself and the people around you. I hope you will have lived in multiple places and learned about many different kinds of people. I hope you will have become okay with being alone. I hope you will have endured your trials well and found joy despite pain.
Go back to 43things.com. How many things have you crossed off your list? Push yourself to become great, and the people around you will become great because of your influence. Share your story, your experience, your intelligence, and your personality. Share everything good about you. Learn everything good about others. And stop worrying.
"Worrying is like a rocking chair; it gives you something to do, but it doesn't get you anywhere." -Dad.
And listen to your Dad. Become more of who you already are. And own two dogs named Rob and Big (a daschund and bulldog).
Kellie Marie Rowland
April 16, 2010